(Overcompensate much?) Then there are those awkward drunken confessions. I have suspicions about anybody who’s a touch too vocal about their heterosexuality. I’m not saying it’s impossible I question the sexuality of my buddies every day. I know there are plenty of you guys who fantasize about seducing a straight man. “The guy wears a shirt that says ‘lube’ on it! Like, come on. Remember Mike? He’s a personal trainer at my gym, and there’s a guy there we call “The Shower Shark.” He’s large, old, and spends about 75 percent of his time trolling the locker room. All we ask is that you’re a gentleman about it. “You should be covering up your dick anyway,” as my one buddy put it. The general consensus is that it’s a little uncomfortable, but it’s part of life and there isn’t much to be done. You are in the men’s room, the locker room, and the gym showers with us. The difference is, we are not in the locker room with girls. Straight guys want to see every pair of breasts on Earth, so we naturally assume you want to see every penis. Speaking of bulges, we know (at least we think we know) that you’re looking at ours. Whereas if he wasn’t gay, one of them would have been for him. “I actually ended up having sex with two chicks one night because he was my wingman. “Girls love having gay guys around because they’re into fashion and they don’t feel threatened,” Mike says. Once the awkward “Are you in love with me?” question was put to bed (figuratively, of course), Mike put his buddy to work. My buddy Mike’s best friend growing up recently came out of the closet. I’ve seen it.) The fact is, nobody likes anything rubbed in their face: not your religion, not your politics, not your vegan whatever, and most definitely not your bulging hot pants.Some of us are lucky enough to reap those rewards. It’s fine if your clothes say something about you, but your t-shirt shouldn’t literally say “I fuck dudes.” (That’s a real shirt. It’s because-and I’m going to quote a friend here-“They’re acting like douchebags.” There were comparisons to the cast of Jersey Shore. It has nothing to do with the fact that these guys are gay. I’m talking about the fishnet tank-tops and cutoffs with pockets hanging out of the bottom. I’m not talking about crossing your legs at the knee or speaking like … well, like a gay guy. But they agreed, almost unanimously, that overly flamboyant gay men are, to put it gently, hard to take.
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I’m not friends with anybody from the Westboro Baptist Church, so none of my buddies have anything outright malicious to say. And one of the benefits is that you attract women. The food must be good the place must be trendy, progressive, “coming up.” My brother Jon works in luxury retail, and contends that his gay clients have more expendable income and take better care of themselves. Without thinking too much of it, we gauge the affluence of whatever place we’re sucking down beers in by the number of gay men we can pick out in the crowd. In the car one afternoon, entirely unprovoked, my friend Eric, who does tech support, offered this about a bar we frequent: “There were a bunch of gay couples at the Taproom. But truthfully, you come up in our conversations anyway. I sat friends down in my living room, ambushed buddies on a snowboarding trip, recruited wives to corner their husbands in their kitchens.
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For this article, I gossiped with every straight man I know about gay guys. You’re not like us, you have cooties, and we gossip. Yo, man-two guys fucked each other on our couch!”Ĭonversations between three men in their late twenties about their gay friend are eerily similar to conversations between boys in their early teens about girls. “Wait! He said he fucked that one girl on the couch when we were at the beach. “Me too! I said he looked gay when he was wearing those white pants.” “I said ‘fag,’ like, a hundred times around him. In the few weeks immediately following his coming out, though, my other two roommates and I clucked like hens. We gradually slipped back into our routine. It was understood that I was not upset, that he would not have to pack, and that the details could work themselves out later. “He was a married guy.” I conjured an image of him, hunched over some guy whose poor wife was out of town. I rolled his answer around in my mouth for a minute. The look on his face told me he wasn’t expecting that question. “But what about all those girls you said you banged?” I asked. I wanted to let him know that I wasn’t disgusted, or angry, or whatever else he might think my silence implied. “I understand if you want me to move out,” he continued.
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I could tell he wanted me to say something he looked like he was about to burst into flames.